4/ 7/2020. Sitting on a Fence

    Not a pleasant place to be. It's a place where you don't know what to do next. The longer you sit there the wor.se you feel. Stagnation..... ick. I was sitting on that fence for four months. The pros and cons of what to do, what to do next. They're were good things about the relationship and then they' re were the bad. Being on that fence was excruciating. I had to make a choice and soon. I was leaning toward an ending. I pulled the stick that broke the camels back. It had to be done. I wound up throwing myself out of the house. I went to my pops house and told him what happened, he said ok but she goes and you stay. I hit myself on the side of my head. That's right ....what was I thinking? Went back to the house and told her I got it wrong your'e leaving not me. So the following Sunday, I had some peace but I was still mad. Next week I wrote a letter to her, in my head I get don't mail it. I say no, I'm mailing it. Get in my truck and head to post office. I'm about1/4 mile from home , when a bird dives bomb into the front of my truck's grill. No more bird. That was a sign, so I didn't mail the letter. In hindsight I'm glad I didn't mail it. Spirit took two tries to deliever the message , the second registered with me. It was a pivot point for me, painfull but necessary. I believe I got a better life henceforth.

      So if you find yourself on a fence, do make a choice for the betterment of your life, as well. It will be for the good of all involved.