4/24/2020. Get off the Pot Already

    One Thanksgiving day, I saw my sister Lara with a sad countenance about her. I said what gives? Oh it's my marriage. What are you going to do about it. I don't know yet. O k I said. The next Thanksgiving, the same thing happens. What are you going to do about it ?  She says I'll think about it. I said thats what you said last year. The only way it gets done is you have to take action.

    Flashback.  Lara is at her mother inlaws (Cathy)kitchen table where theyre discussing her son Jerry's behavior, Lara's husband. Cathy says to Lara, do what I've done let it go in one ear and out the other, and go and do what you want to do. This is what Cathy did in her own marriage. Lara says to Cathy, Well first of all my names not Cathy. Thats it in a nut shell. Shes going to do it her way. Good for her.

 
    It's now 6 months later in the spring. I get a phone call from her, can you help me move? Ok I say. It takes two hours to get there. Pull up 9am on Sat. Other family members are there and no Jerry. The blitz move was on. Six hours later, she was moved out and in her new place. Jerry came home to a different life.

 

    Next Thanksgiving, her mood was brighter. Are you glad you did it?  I say. Oh yes she said.  Things will go on and on if there is no action. Action is a determination and a strong will. Use it to make yourself a better life. Lessons are learned and nothing goes to waste.. She and Jerry are still friends to this day.

4/23/2020. Boiler House

    Those were the words on the  side of an old wood boat, sitting on a trailer. The paint scheme was red and black. When I see that combination, to me, it means watch out. Most likely not a pleasant experience. I noted it. This was the begining of March 2020, the start of covid19.

    A small swelling on my left bicep started to develop. I didn't pay it much mind. I flew out of state. By the  3rd week, I knew I had a problem. I called an urgent care, they wanted 150 dollars to look at it and 250 to remove it. Hung up and said no way. I asked Spirit what to do, no answer. I used my smartphone instead. I found out the difference between a cyst and a boil, I had the later. It said it takes about 3 weeks to resolve. Occasionaly use hot compresses and eventually the body will dispense with it. I found all of it to be true. So Sprirt tipped me off with message that was on boat. And it knew I had a smart phone. Spirit doesn't always give you a direct answer, you may have to look for it yourself. It gives you the tools and you do the work. Persistance and focus wins the day. May you have a safe day.

4/21/2020. Nova Scotia

    One of my favorite places, just a beautiful island. It's in the news today, because of a terrible evil that befell them Saturday. Mass murder. Or unbridaled narcissism. I'm not happy with the way my life is going going, so I'm going to end it and take some people with me. One word....Sicko.  For a narcissist to heal himself he has to put his focus outward get it off himself. Go out and do for someone else. Volunteering helps you heal in slow motion. Over time your attitude will shift and with it comes a place of joy.

    I put out to Spirit, if you want to get my attention show me doubles of whatever. So one day I'm at the flea market and I see a table with a Nova Scotia souvenir on it. I didn't pay it any mind, 5 min later another table had a bunch of old postcards all on Nova Scotia, I bought them all. Never been there, made up my mind that I'm going. It was a fantastic trip. Took my camper truck and headed north.

    Eventually made it to long Island. The highway was something, I'm doing  60 and the other motorists are passing me like crazy, even on the shoulder. After 3 hours of that I had enough. Next exit I'm getting off. Soon I enter a suburban town, I don't know where. Up ahead I see an all you can eat place, make a bee line for the parking lot. I open their massive door and there are tables laden for a king. You name it they gots it, and all for 10 dollars including drinks. The pain between my shoulder blades long forgotten. I stayed there 2 hours, one of the best 2 hours of my life. And there were only 6 patrons in there, with a gorgeous fire burning to my right. New York ain't so bad after all. Next day rode up to Montauk and took a ferry to Conneticut. Stopped in Mystic to see the Charles Morgan whaling vessel. The day was heavy overcast and cool and damp. It was earie. But probably the best way to see the ship. The weather kept the crowds away and seeing it in black and white, gave it an old timey feel. It felt like it couldn't wait to get out whalin.

    Now it was up to Bar Harbor ME to catch a ferry to Nova Scotia. I didn't know where to go, it was getting late. So I parked on side of a small road, slept in the camper. The next morning I looked down the hill and 100 ft down is the ship I'm looking for. I got down just in time, if I were to miss this boat, I would have to wait 2 more days. Lucked out there. It was over an 8 hr trip to get to Yarmouth N. S. Had great time. Peggy's Cove has huge boulders that fall into the ocean, an off white color. The lighthouse is small but picturesque. Then it was on to Halifax. Had some experience here during the week. Met a guy from another country that moved here from Asia, who spoke perfect english. He was an unofficial advocate for the poor. He had a giving nature about him. He was somebody you would want to emulate. There are few like him around.

    One day there in town, I'm walking on sidewalk and look to my left and see a couple hooligans on the far sidewalk. A young prof. female walks in front of me, crossing the wide street and she's heading in their direction. What is she crazy, as I slow my gait, to see if she would need my assistance. She's ok, the one bigger guy's i're was directed at me. He steps into the road in my direction telling me to come to him, yeah right. I picked up my gait and exited the scene. My new friends there invited me to the soup kitchen, I demured but they insisted, so I went. There was a long line there, in the line I notice the guy from the street, dressed in black, he looked sereen. In the center of his vest he held a single red rose, wierd. I knew what it meant, I passed some sort of test. Sometime during the week, I was in my camper about 12 am, I here a knock, come on out I want to talk to you. I said get lost. He said I have a gun, I said so, then just shoot. And that was that. Rest of night was quiet. Another episode, one of the homeless guys got enough money to buy a big hamburger. Another homeless guy comes by and he cuts his burger in half to give to him. Talk about caring.

    Looking back at those past years. I still think of that Asian in Halifax.

4/20/2000. Nightmare

    Not a pleasant occurence, most of my life I had them. Probably started around when I was  8. I would see these 3, I would call them balls not a solid though. They would appear on the horizon and slowly come near my face, and it would feel like I was suffocating. I would wake up in a sweat. I would get that dream once in awhile for years to come.

    I always liked to go to flea markets. Saturday I was walking around and got into a conversation with an older guy, marveling about all the different stuff to be had here. I said you got everything except coffins, he said well one day a long while ago, a guy was here selling coffins. He came here 2 weeks, until the owners of flea market asked him to leave with his coffins. One day at this market there was a vendor who had a book laying on the dirt, it was the Bhagavad gita. The cover is what got me. There was a young male laying asleep under a tree and what appeared to be an apparition of himself leaving his body. It gave me the creeps. I didn't buy the book. Much later I would think about that day. Keep an open mind, I would tell myself. I would eventually pick up books on spirituality and read them. This went on for many years. My nightmares shifted from balls to tornadoes, I'd wakeup in a pool of sweat, then I would change the sheets. This was happening about once a month for a couple years. Then it was twice a month, then once a week. I remember while I was running from said tornado, a book I read take a picture of what afflicts you in the dream. In the dream I reach back to my back pocket and pull out a camera. In the dream, I'm looking at this camera and thinking how did get there. Then I remembered the tornado, it was almost on me, quick put camera to my eye and see the black tornado and then I snap the shutter. Instantaneously I shoot up to a nearby cloud, I walk over to edge of cloud and peek down, there is my body, running for it's life from said twister. I went left, the twister went left, I went right the twister went right. The higher me safe on the cloud, no sweat. From that day forward, I never had a nightmare again. A friend of mine also had nightmares, her afflictors were big ferocious cats, like lions+ tigers, she stopped running and turned using God's name, the cats became Kittens, and she picked one up. Her nightmares. also ended.

    These are some ways that spirit can help you with having a more fullfilling life. I'm very thankfull not to have to change the bedding anymore. Spirit showed me, how to get above a problem.

4/19/2020. Dead. End Thinking

   

    Walking the same road over and over again. We have to ask ourselves, what do we want to accomplish here. Say every Sunday we take some time to evaluate our life. Keep a notebook handy, one that is sturdy with a strong binder and when open lays flat. Date each entry day, month and year. Write down what you are doing and the amount of satisfaction you get from it. This way you will monitor your progress or lack thereof. If your not satisfied then think of ways to make that pivot. Then the hard part comes, putting it into action. Action is the key word here.

    

    My friend Dan was married about 4 or 5 times. We were working at Dan's house one day when he gets a call from his ex girl friend , can you come over and give me your opinion on my front steps. He said ok, and I went along for the 40 mile ride. We gave her a price, she wasn't keen on it. Dan was mad because he would do lots of odd jobs for her in the past for free. Dan was trying to get me a job.  I said on way back, why you always doing things for your exes? He said your right, I'm done. I said yeah... A couple years later were working on an art project when he gets a phone call from his girlfriend, an electric switch just shorted out. Could he come fix it. We head on out, when we get there she was entertaining a man. Dan goes off, a bunch of yelling. Dan is still upset but he fixes the switch nonetheless. When we headed back in car, I turn to him remember a couple years ago, you said you were done fixing things for girlfriends? He just glared at me. He still hadn't moved on. Circumstances will repeat until we do what we say were going to do.

    Dan was married either 4 or 5 times, He was getting ready for number 6, running around getting things organized for a couple of months. He was out doing another task for the wedding when he gets words in his head, what are you doing, you don't have to get married. He stopped and thought. Oh, that's right maybe I don't. He cooled it on down and overtime they went their separate ways. Dead end ways were finally over.

    You set a goal and spirit will help you attain that goal. Bringing the circumstance around and around til we do what we said we were going to do. Know who you are and what you want. Be firm about it. Spend time at least once a month going over your goals and asking Spirit for it's help.

4/17/2020. Shamus

     That was a guy I visited every morning, to get my bacon and egg sandwich. It was on a crisp kaiser bun, 5 inches thick. I can taste it like it was yesterday. Always looked forward to crossing his threshold. He was in WW2, worked for the OSS, which was a precursor to the CIA. He was a big guy and gregarious. He would break out in song on occasion. He was fun to josh around with. One day I said God what's wrong with me? Next morning, I walk into his store and before I can get my greeting out, he says you know what's wrong with you. Your'e arrogant, vain, selfish and cold. There was a bunch more, but I didn't have my note pad with me. Darn. So God gave me his answer via Shamus.


     A year later I walked in. And he says hey Dan you're never going to believe this but a guy just left 5 min ago, he looked just like you but he was 10 yrs. older than you.  I can't believe it. A friend of ours had a store across the street. I was good friends with him. He was also a W W2 guy . One day he was in a big park with his family having a good time. He thinks he sees me walking by. I'm a good distance away, he runs after me calling my name. The guy doesn't respond. When he catches up to me, the guy turns and he sees its not me, but a real close resemblance.

    I will have a double story in coming posts. Once I went back to a town I used to live in. It's been15yrs. I'm getting gas and I'm leaning against my vehicle looking across the pump island. Theres a small black sports car getting gas, the guy is in black clothes. He looks a little younger than me, It was the cleaned up version of me. Now that was pretty cool.

4/I5/2020. Death Imminent

    I picked up a paper and an article caught my attention. British couple found dead next to rental car.  Back then rental cars were marked. After this event, they removed icons referencing a rental car. The thugs targeted them, the rental car had them pegged as tourists. The thugs were under 1 8 yrs old. Maybe 4 or5 of them. Dam creeps.

    An event was being held, in the same state that the British couple lost their lives. Now it's a couple yrs later. I got to my beautiful hotel an unpacked. It felt real good soaking in the sunshine and viewing the soft colors of my surroundings, inside and out. I was in a good mood. I had alot of hours to kill, so I decided to take a bus trip, to the outskirt of the city. The park was fantastic, lots of people and animals. I got on the nearest trail, when I came around the bend, there was such a sight. I will never forget. It was like I "walked to the garden of Eden. The sunlight was filtering through the trees, cascading upon the blue pond. Birds of varying shapes and colors were alighting on the water. Kids and parents in their Colorfull clothes all around the area. The way the light hit the green green grass was just magnificent. I felt unbridaled joy enter my heart. This is what life could be. Not a care in the world. I stayed as long as I could. I

    In an hour, dusk would come. I got on the bus, back to my hotel. What a great adventure, I just had. Its dark now and the bus comes to a stop, I hear bus driver say everyone off, I say you got to be kidding me. He said no its the end terminal. So I'm in the bad part of town, a couple miles from the hotel. It's a suburban area. A guy on the bus was now on foot a good distance ahead of me. I stopped arguing with the driver and bounded after the guy. It's getting darker. Within 5 minutes I feel them behind me. I don't look because I know theyre there. I'm thinking about the British couple and to make it to that street lamp up ahead. Have to make it to that light and put my back up against the 8 ft chain link fence. Turn around and the 2 creeps are staring me down. Two black kids. The kid on my left has his right hand in his pocket holding a gun, but I could tell he was faking, the other guy held a bowling ball size piece of concrete. The guy with the crete was the alpha dog. Where you from alpha says, I name the state. All the way from there he says. Yes. Let's have it, I reach for my wallet and purposely give it to the quiet one on the left. That pissed off the crete guy. He angrilly takes it from quiet guy, telling me to deal with him. My main adversary was crete guy. I knew quiet guy would run. Now for that piece of concrete he was holding, I knew for it to do damage he would have to hoist it over his head, once he did that, l would punch him in the stomache. The crete would descend upon his head. There was 4 twenties folded in my left rear pocket, the wallet was in my right rear pocket. When he opened my wallet he saw a whole  8 bucks. He can't believe it, you come down all that way with 8 bucks? Yep. Give me the bag, I hand it to quiet man.  Pissed off alpha again, he pulls out a magazine water bottle and birdseed container. What the? He calls me by my state name, He says Dakota ( not my real state) next time you come visit bring more money with you. With disgust he says you need it more than me puts money back in and hands it to quiet guy who gives it to me. It was over.

    When I had my back to the fence, I thought of my family and said to myself, you did have a good life. No matter what happens I'm good.

    Back at the hotel I bump into my friend and tell him, I think I got mugged. He says what do you mean, you either were or not. I said, well he gave me the money back. Hour later it seemed like everyone knew about what happened to me. Now that's a grapevine